Alexis Bradford
Minds. They are a jungle gym full of thoughts.
They hold anything from the little things to the
Biggest things as big as the secrets you hold that
Make the biggest impact and the little things.. Well,
The little things like the memories you made with
Your Mother when the times were better when the
Time went by like days were minutes like time
Wasn’t important because we were together.
But as more and more time went by the more you
Were gone and the more you were gone the more
You disappeared like a shadow into the
Darkness like the time we spent WAS the darkness.
You didn’t care how much you were gone as long
As you WERE gone because to you it was ok. It
Was ok to leave your two little girls who are
Supposed to be your lifeline the reason for your
Smile and the reason for your effort you put into
Each and every day it was OK. We were left to live
In the gallows we had to call home where we
Couldn’t even rest our heads with the comfort of
Us knowing that we are ok and without having the
Reassurance that we are worth it we are GOOD
Enough. We had to go through living life behind
A closed curtain while in front of the curtain was
The main act. You made everyone believe we
Were the bad that we were mad we were crazy that
We were lying. You thought it was ok. You picked
A man over your lifeline. You chose a weed over
Your two daisies. Your two daisies that out of a field
Of roses those daisies should be the first you chose
But they weren’t.. Why weren’t they? When you were
At your deepest and darkest spot like you were in the
Deep end or at the end of a devastating chapter who
Was always in YOUR corner? But yet at any moment
You leave and wave goodbye like the tidal waves that
Come in from the sea. Then when you’re back you
Stay and play with our emotions and lead us on like
We’re on a leash waiting to unleash our raw emotions
But to you that wasn’t ok. You don’t ever think or
Wonder what we’re feeling or how we feel or see the
Pain that goes on deep in our brain but yet you still
Gain the praise for “always being by our side” when in
Reality, you were never even in front of us. When you
Ask if we’re ok we have to pretend we don’t know what
You’re talking about which in return leaves you
Curious and worried but are you really ever worried?
Do you even really care that we are not ok? I wish I
Could just see you one more time so I can show you
How much I’ve grown but I have to condone the way
We are thrown out of your life like it is ok. I can’t
Begin to put into words how my world has shattered
And has been put on a platter and served to nothing. My
World has gone to nothing. Night and Day I sit here and
Pray that maybe you’ll come back but hey, It’s supposed
To be ok.