So Strong, So Brave

Amber Koteras

You are so strong.
You are so brave.
You are always so strong and so brave.
Such an inspiration.
Such a fucking inspiration.

I don’t want to be strong anymore.
It was not my choice to be strong.
Your strong is my day-to-day life.
Your strong is what I have to do to survive.

I don’t want to be brave anymore.
It was not my choice to be brave.
Your brave is my world falling to pieces.
Your brave is my coping through catastrophe.

I don’t want this.
I never wanted this.

I want to be weak.
I want to curl up into a ball and cry myself to sleep.
I want to lick my wounds and throw a pity party.
I don’t want to keep getting up.
I don’t want to try, try, try again.
I would give anything to not have to be so strong, so brave.